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My mother in law has expressed stress and panic over the following issues:

1) Elliot is going to jump through our glass coffee table.

The glass is very thick and supported on a sturdy wooden frame. Underneath the glass is a wooden shelf. I have no idea why she would think he would try to jump “through” it. I have already told her we will be covering the edges with padding when he begins to move around. Also I don’t see why he would just choose this item of furniture in particular. The glass? Should I be covering all the windows and doors too? Do young children have a fatalistic approach to glass?

2) Elliot is going to be bitten by the turtles.

I may have mentioned this before. The opening to the turtles tank is over a metre from the floor. By the time he can actually reach in he will be old enough to learn that putting hands in tank = fingers being nipped. The turtles are not going to leap out and savage him when my back is turned. Well not as long as I keep feeding them enough I guess....

The next and latest fear though is a bit of a doozy.....

3) She has extorted me to NEVER leave Elliot alone in public anywhere because someone will kidnap him.

.....

I really didn’t know what to say to that. First of all I can’t understand why she would think I would leave him alone anywhere. He’s a 2 month old baby. He can’t fend for himself. I’m a new mother but I’m not stupid. Besides he screams blue murder when I’m not around.

Secondly though I think he’s cute, I doubt that someone will be so enthralled by him to spontaneously steal him. Right out under my nose. Unless they plan on knocking me out first.

There is enough fear when you are dealing with a baby, especially when it’s your first. My fears however are more to do with us being hit by a car or bicycle when we are out or something falling on him during an earthquake. We’ve had several near misses in the first scenario, and the second one is also quite realistic. My fears do not include glass table stunts, rabid savaging turtles or kidnapping.

It’s disappointing really. What I have sought advice on is about finding out what services are available to mothers and kids, which supermarkets do delivery and how to arrange it and which hospital I should take him to if there is a problem. I’m still searching for the answers to these questions - perhaps they are too mundane for my mother in law to give advice on. Much more fun dreaming up unrealistic scenarios to try and frighten herself with.....

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